koreen then and now

Koreen’s Letter

Dear 16 yr old me,

Let me begin by saying, enjoy being young. Don’t try to grow up so fast! Be goofy, laugh a lot, stay innocent, for as long as you can. In a blink of an eye this will all be over, and you don’t get a second chance. Believe in yourself, because you really are awesome!

Go look in the mirror and repeat after me – You are Beautiful inside and out, Your Thighs AREN’T FAT!!

Stop being so self conscious about them, and focus on all the great qualities you have.

I know you think you know a lot, because you had to grow up too fast, but the reality is you don’t really know ANYTHING YET!! Always remember God loves ALL of you (even the dark not so happy parts).

My sweet, young, 16 yr. old me… I wish I could fill you with the confidence you need, and the love you deserve. Maybe if you felt loved, and loved yourself you would’ve known how special you were and you wouldn’t have tried to seek love from the wrong people in the wrong way. Be good to your precious body, because it really is the only one you get. Treat it with respect, because you are WORTH IT!

Don’t always try to be so strong and independent all the time; we all need help sometimes. Don’t be afraid to ask. There are so many people who truly care about you. Know that, and believe it because it’s true!! Choose your friends wisely, don’t latch onto someone as broken as you, she will only bring you down, surround yourself with friends who will always lift you up. They are all around you, don’t shut them out!!

JUST SAY NO TO DRUGS AND SEX!!!!

I know they are tempting, you had a painful abusive childhood, and it may seem like the only escape….the only way to be numb, or to feel good for once.

Both of these things are NOT the answer, and will cause you more pain, and more regret than you will ever think possible.
Boys are not the answer to your deepest problem, you can NOT depend on some one else to make you happy. That’s your job! That boy that you think you love will end up hurting you, and you both will make the biggest mistake of your lives……

That mistake; it’s an abortion.

The boy who says he loves you, and you think you love him, says “if you don’t have an abortion it will ruin my life,” and that he wont want to be with you anymore. So you do it, and… well, it ruins your life. The depression you felt before the mistake is nothing that compares to the sadness that fills you and the regret you feel for the rest of your life (and guess what, you aren’t with that boy anymore…..you end up leaving him).

I know it’s hard being young and succumbing into the pressures around you, but hear me out…If you do irresponsible things, bad things will and do happen. YOU ARE NOT THE EXCEPTION. Everyone at your age feels invincible, like it won’t happen to them. You are NOT invincible. It WILL, and DOES, happen to you.

Drugs aren’t the answer either…. I know you need an escape, I know the pain is too much to bare. You need to talk to someone, a responsible loving adult, who has your best interest in mind.

Drugs only cause more damage, more pain. Your mind is fragile, be careful with it. Drugs will give you more anxiety, depression and trouble!!

Drugs will kill friends you know, drugs will change people for the worst. That damaged girl, you thought was your best friend, will choose drugs over you. She will hurt you time and time again. Eventually she ends up in Prison…..

*(I will say this, I’m proud that you finally cut ties with her, she was a huge mistake, and I wish you never knew her.)*

Seek counsel, from a professional. Your depression is real and you need to talk to some one to heal, and sort things out.
You aren’t alone; there are people who want to help, even if they aren’t your parents.

Love,
Koreen